So Sweet Pea had a visit with Bio Mom the other day. First time in 6 weeks. It was also the next to the last time. The caseworker said she has one more final good-bye visit when she chooses before her final consent hearing. Selfishly, I am jumping for joy...but then I feel guilty, because in my heart, I am feeling sorrow for Bio Mom. I cannot imagine saying goodbye to my child. All I can imagine is heartache, anguish, pain...Even though she has never lived with her, as we were placed with her straight from the hospital, she did carry her for 9 months, and Sweet Pea is "her" child, biologically.
She brought her a few toys and a little hoodie to the visit, which I thought was very sweet. Her entire demeanor has changed since she has been away from Bio Dad for the past 5 months. As far as I know, she is clean and living at a halfway house where she is monitored closely. I truly hope she can pull it together and keep it together...so she has a chance with the baby she is now carrying. But, when Bio Dad is released from prison, I am not sure how well she will hold up. She has told me that he has some sort of control over her emotionally. She knows he is not good for her, but can't stay away from him. So, my dear readers, I will be praying for God's hand of guidance in both of their lives, that they may know Him, and prosper, and that He watches over the precious baby she is carrying.
The Queen Mama