"I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him." 1 Samuel 1:27
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Monday, September 24, 2012

A Visit With Mom in Handcuffs

Sweet Pea had her permanency hearing last week.  Well, her brothers had theirs, hers was postponed because Bio Dad said he did not know about it (although he's in jail, and my letter states it went to him and his lawyer), but anyway, it is rescheduled.  However, since I was present at the sibling hearing (which Sweet Pea's was a part of), and Bio Mom was present, we had to endure a "visit".  Bio Mom requested visitation for that day during the hearing with the judge and he complied.  Bio Mom, who sat there in her prison stripes, shackled legs and handcuffs...Bio Mom, who violated her probation when she left the state with her prison escapee boyfriend, who left her children for 3 months without a good-bye, without a note, without a call to the caseworker....who would still be "on the lam" if she wasn't apprehended.  Bio Mom, who has seen her 9 month old baby girl a total of 24 hours over 6 months since she was born...wants a visit.  Forgive my crassness, but the system really stinks!
Anyway, the deputies took Bio Mom to a very small room and removed her cuffs.  I took Sweet Pea to see her.  Two caseworkers came with me.  Bio Mom cried when she held Sweet Pea.  Perhaps, since she was now sober after being incarcerated for three weeks, she could clearly see the consequences of her actions, what she gave up...a precious little life...the life she and her boyfriend made...a life she knows she will lose the rights to soon...all to be with her boyfriend, for drugs, for whatever...I, of course, was very nice to Bio Mom, and answered questions she posed to me about Sweet Pea.  I don't hate this person, or loathe her.  I don't feel sorry for her, as she made her choices.  I do, however, empathize with her as one mother to another...I could tell by her face, her tears, that she did realize how precious Sweet Pea is...Does she hate me?  I don't know.  She has never shown it.  I do know that she wants post adoption contact, and that is not going to happen.  So, the answer to my previous question may change...
Such is adoption through foster care..
Blessings, my dear readers,
The Queen Mama

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