"I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him." 1 Samuel 1:27
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Monday, February 27, 2012

"Annie"

Annie is the little 5 year old girl we had for the weekend.  I used this name for her because she looks like she could be the lead in that musical.  She is adorable with bright curly red hair, freckles, and two missing front teeth.  She loves everything Princess, and likes to wear dresses.  She is an only child with a very strong personality.  I had told you in my prior post about her physical aggressiveness and her swearing. Yes, she was a challenging child to have in our home, but I was able to show this child the love of Christ while she was here.
We had a toddler bed with Princess bedding for Annie to sleep in.  She was so excited.  When I started the nightly bedtime routine that we do with our other children, she settled right into my lap to read a book.  After reading the book, it was time to say prayers.  I asked her if she said prayers, and she said no.  She didn't know what prayers were.  I showed her how we folded our hands and bowed our heads, and we said the following prayer:
"Dear God",
"Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep.  May Angels watch me through the night, and wake me with the morning's light." We made sure to ask God to bless Annie and her Mommy, Daddy, and Grandma whom she had told us about.  She asked me what God Bless meant.  I then told her the story of Jesus and how she could ask him to come into her heart and he would be with her forever to keep watch over her and keep her company no matter where she is.  She loved learning about God, and asked me to say the bedtime prayer over and over and over, I'm sure so she could remember it herself.  I asked her if she had ever gone to Church or Sunday School, and she said she was in a church for a puppet show one time.  Not sure if she would ever get to attend Sunday School if she went back home, I told her she didn't have to go to church to love God, or to have God love her, that he always will hear her prayers.
I tucked her in, and laid on the floor beside the bed.  She got up in about 10 seconds and asked if she could lay on the floor beside me.  She wanted me to put my arm around her.  "No, not like that, like that."  I could tell she must have slept with her mom that way.  "Do you have a bed at home?" I asked.  "No.  Mommy and I sleep on the floor," she said.  Her mom must have sung her Twinkle Twinkle Little Star at night, because that is the song she wanted to sing over and over.  She then started crying so hard, saying she wanted her Mommy, and thinking she would never see her again.  My tears fell silently while I tried to comfort her.  "You are not my family.  I don't love you." she said.  "No, we are just a family to take care of you for awhile and love you while you are here," I told her.   Everyday this little angel of God  said "I think I'm going home to my Mommy today".  These things just break my heart.  Being a foster parent is so rewarding, but it can be gut wrenching at these times.  Most of the time, the bio parents involved love their children, they just can't take care of them due to many different circumstances.  It is a sad situation for everyone involved.
When the judge declared Annie would stay with her Grandma until further notice, I thought Annie would be happy that she didn't have to stay with us anymore.  However, Annie screamed, cried, held onto her mother's leg in the courtroom, and just wanted to go home to her Mommy no matter what.  It sure tugged at my heart and made me say a thousand prayers for Annie's mom to please get it together so she could take care of Annie again soon.
Even though I knew in my heart that this was not a good placement for our family, and that the caseworker had told us Annie would probably go back home or to a relative, I felt her placement with us was not an accident.  I think God works in ways that we will never understand, and I am so glad that I was able to share his love, and introduce him to Annie! I hope that she can remember Him as she waits and hopes to be with her Mother again.
I hope God is helping you through your journey, whether it be foster care or something entirely different...If you need a prayer partner, I'd be happy to lift you up...
Blessings,
Queen Mama

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